The Lucidity of Love

Hey everyone! Just wanted to thank you again for reading! This week I'm giving you two posts that are very different because love and sex are often interchangeable in society. I wanted to dispel that in my posts. Make sure to read The Functionality of Sex.

 

I'm also doing something a bit new! Stories can speak from the page, but the voice has a way of bringing them to life. I record myself often, but wanted to share those recordings with you. So either listen to the audio or read the text right below the audio. Or do both! Let me know if you like it! 

Text: 

My favorite moment is after a storm. When the thunder has softened and the sky turns a shade of grey never seen on a sunny day. The world is noisy and quiet at the same time. 

This is how I love. Graciously. Softly. Quietly.

Of course, like a thunder storm, there are times when my love is so strong it shakes me. Its loud and ferocious, and scary. I wonder how a body so small can be capable of such a big feeling. 

To think that there could be loves that open you, wound you, and heal you all at once. It sounds so impossible and terrifying that its easy to run. I've ran. Many times. Sometimes I think I'm still running.

See thats the thing about love. Its not tangible. Its not logical. You can't pick it up and drop it on the ground. Your body knows and it tells you. Sometimes it tells you in a dramatic fashion; your stomach drops or your chest feels tight. Sometimes it tells you when you feel so at ease its incomparable. Other times it tells you when you are in throes of ecstasy and didn't know the heights pleasure could reach. 

I've reached the highest of heights and I've touched the lowest of lows. I know love is present in me, because after the storm passes, I am here. Loving so unconditionally that it hurts. Wanting to love selfishly but knowing that's not the way I do it.

I love graciously, softly, and quietly. And it sucks at times, because loving like that, means you don't always win. You don't always get to love fiercely. Instead you love freely. You let people come in and out. You see them. You forgive them. You get hurt. You get moved by your ability to let go. You surpass your expectations each time. 

You get ready to be misunderstood. 

You get ready to not understand.

I used to fight the way I loved. Wish it didn't exist. Want it to be louder or silent. But instead, I love like after a storm. I will have made you quiet. Made you more gracious. 

Softened you. 

Then let you go.